October 2, 2012

I'm Too Tired to Write a New One

This blog post is actually the same one I wrote for my kids vintage blog, but it explains why I'm too tired to write an entirely new one.  Plus, I think you'll enjoy the story, or get grossed out.  Anyhow, new content to come tomorrow. 

My church held a women's fashion night fundraiser this past Saturday, and I was asked to put on a fashion show, where I featured vintage pieces from my shop. I did and September was a crazy month. I've already expressed that. This post is not about that. It's about what happened at home.

I was at church on Saturday from 12-9 pm, and in hellish heels for 4 hours. I feel so relieved to finally go home around 9 p.m. and as soon as I walk in the door, I see the living room has random toys and clothes thrown all around. That doesn't bother me because I know my husband must have had his hands full watching the kids all day and he's putting them down upstairs, so I continue to look for my family. We bathe and change the kids in my son's room, but instead, I see my husband changing the kids in my daughter's room and there are more clothes thrown in the hallway. This is the conversation that happens next:

Me: What's going on here? Why are you changing them in here?

Jonah: Jessie pooped on the carpet.

Me: what do you mean? What did you say?

Jonah, yelling: Jessie pooped on the carpet.

Me looking at husband: What's he talking about?

Husband: Exactly what he said.

Me: Huh?

Husband: Jessie pooped on the carpet.

Me: Oh my.

Husband: and then..

Me: What do you mean and then? There's more? HOw did this happen?

Husband: She was naked and she pooped on the carpet.


Husband: I was getting her ready for her bath and she ran outside and did a kimchi squat and pooped in front of Jonah's train table.

Me: Oh my gosh.

Husband: and then, she picked it up.


Husband: and then she put it in her mouth.


Husband: and then I yelled, "JESSIE" and she threw it on the ground.


Husband: you're going to have to rinse out the bathtub because brown stuff kept smearing everywhere.

Husband then proceeded to go to church because he was in charge of cleaning up the fashion night.

Later, Jonah tells me, "Did you know poop has crumbs?" Oh my goodness.

So, after cleaning the smeared poo on the bathroom and scrubbing down the bathtub and cleaning the carpet, I put Jonah down and went downstairs ready for a beer and some pizza. I find an ant colony on my countertops. So, I probably cursed out loud and cleaned the counter, picked up the mess in the living room, and enjoyed my beer and pizza at 11 p.m. That was the best beer and pizza I ever had.


  1. HAHAHAHAHA Oh my goodness!!! At least there was a reward at the end of it all (BEER AND PIZZA!!!) too hilarious and awful at the time, but oh doesn't it make a great story????? Any parent that says they haven't been through something similar is probably lying. Thank you for sharing, it made me laugh...I hope your feet are better (Honestly, a man had to have invented heels right? While I love being a bit taller, these days I'll take comfort over height in uncomfy heels!) and that your house is back to normal :)

    1. oh Galine, I'm glad you were amused! I am amused by it now, but was not that night. And I'm still not sure if my house is back to normal, or ever will be until these two turn 18, but they sure make life fun!

  2. Ha! Well, we have a dog, so I've dealt with poop on the floor before. (Actually, I've made Andy deal with poop on the floor before...) But not poop in the tub! My favorite part of this is how Jonah couldn't wait to give you the big news! That was some well-deserved beer and pizza, Ms. Anna--I *bet* you enjoyed it!

    1. oh karen, the poop was not only in the tub, it was all over the bathroom. smeared. I'm glad you have Andy to handle your poop matters. What a great man!